There's so little money in my bank account my scenic checks show a ghetto.
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl...
What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the...
Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away...
The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear...
Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument a bank has...
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to...
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing...
People look at me and they go 'You're white you're smart you must have...
The fellow that has no money is poor. The fellow that has nothing but money...
Kids are meant to believe that their stepping stone to massive money is 'The...
Because I don't take money I'll go anywhere and do a benefit concert with...
I saw Deep Purple live once and I paid money for it and I thought 'Geez...
The way the bankers have kind of toppled the way money is distributed and...
Kids are meant to believe that their stepping stone to massive money is 'The...
I have no one to leave the money to. I'm a single man. I like spending my...