Dad I'm in some trouble. There's been an accident and you're going to hear all sorts of things about me from now on. Terrible things.
My two secrets to staying healthy: wash your hands all the time. And if you can't use Purell or one of the sanitizers. And the other is hot peppers. I eat a lot of hot peppers. I for some reason started doing that in 1992 and I swear by it.